Wednesday, January 14, 2009

"The Month After Christmas!"

This caught my eye, and is worth a I'm not suggesting it relates you???

T'was the month after Christmas,
And all through the house,
Nothing would fit me,
not even a blouse.
The cookies I'd nibbled,
the chocolate I'd taste
At the holiday parties
had gone to my waist!
When I got on the scales
there arose such a number!
Then I walked to the store
(less a walk than a lumber).
I'd remember the marvellous meals I'd prepared;
The gravies and sauces and beef nicely rared.
The wine and the rum balls,
the bread and the cheese
and the way I'd never said,
"No thank you..., please..."
As I dressed myself in my husband's old shirt
and prepared once again to do battle with dirt...
I said to myself, as I only can,
"You can't spend a winter,
disguised as a man!"
So, away with the last of the sour cream dip,
get rid of the fruit cake, every cracker and chip.
Every last bit of food
that I like must be banished
till all the additional ounces have vanished.
I won't have a cookie, not even a lick.
I'll want only to chew on a long celery stick.
I won't have hot biscuits, or corn bread, or pie.
I'll munch on a carrot and quietly cry.
I'm hungry, I'm lonesome,
and life is a bore...
But isn't that what January is for?
Unable to giggle, no longer a riot,
Happy New Year to all,
and to all.........
a good diet.

No comments: